Preparing Our Guidances.

.1.
“On-The-Spot-‘Selfing'”.

.3.
“Winning” Every “Argument”
– – – – –

[details in the next posts].

—————————-
.2.
‘No-Lose’ – ‘Method III’.
—————————-

FIVE STEP METHOD III
FOR FRIENDLY
‘WIN-WIN-WIN’ 
COOPERATIVE PROBLEM-SOLVING 
AND NEEDS & HOWS RECOGNITION. 


{Method I the ‘bosses’ usually win;
Method II the ‘underlings’ usually win:
Method III Every-one’s Need is equally-included}.
– – – – – – –
(With acknowledgement to Dr Thomas Gordon in 
‘People’ Effectiveness Training 
& further exponents
e.g. Robert Bolton in People Skills).

– – – – – – –

INTRODUCTION:
Please read through
every part
of the following lines 
before attempting to judge, 
or even think about,

this methodology.
===================================

The Guidance Lines

are of primary 
and
‘deal-breaking’
necessity.  
– – – – – 

Guidance (Rule) #1: 
No-one can come with any competitive 
or comparative advantage.

Each comes ’empty-handed’, with a ‘blank slate’. 
Each participates equally,
patiently, 
non-competitively,
non-‘leadingly’,
non-invasively,
non-pushily,
non-manipulatively.
– – – – –

To allow
“improvement by suggestion-or-‘mere-mention'”,
participants might agree to add
a penultimate round, 
so that any previous input
may be clarified
& unanimously-approved; 
before
confirming every input by the 
“in indelible black-ink”
final round. 
– – – – –

Guidance #2: 
Move in one direction around the round-table; 
at each step many patient rounds
will usually give much better results
than merely one or two hurried rounds. 
Each person gets equal 
non-transferrable time per round. 
– – – – –

Guidance #3: 
Silence is absolutely ‘Goalden’,  
because
each individual needs to be
descending 
‘undistracted’
deeper and deeper inside theirself, 
until they have finally arrived at,
and formulated into words,
their own 
latest-recognised 
real and most-important need.  
– – – – –

Guidance #4: 
Keep going around at each step, 
until each participant has clearly stated 
in their own words what their ultimate need is. 


NB
Everyone needs to include,
at every step,
advocacy-allowances for 
Persons-Not-Present
Who-May-Be-Affected
By The Meeting’s
Decisions 
Planning
and
Implementation.  
– – – – –

Guidance #5:
Remember:
NO interrupting, interpreting, altering; 
NO competing. 

Let each finish verbatimly at first. 
You might have agreed to add
a penultimate rounds for 
“clarification & unanimity”; 
allowing and even controlledly-encouraging 
a possible suggestion for improvement
to any individual’s input or part thereof; 
before confirming all Inputs 
to be
in the end
“Further Action-Planning & Implementing Cognisantly”
“signed by each participant in black ink”. 
– – – – –

Guidance #6:
Similarly
“co-draw-up”
the Details of
Action-Plan-A
and of its
Contingency-Plan-B.


—————————————————————————————————- 

This Method III requires
co-voluntary personal
and
unequivocal 
commitments: 

otherwise,

any-would-be participant
must
“go queue up
to fight it out”
in the
Regular & High Courts-of-Law”. 

_______________________

To continue
go on to page 2 for the
Five  Steps
and
some support sources.


===================================================   
page 2 of 2

Method III :
every-one
gets their real need recognized 
and
cooperatively planned to be
co-sustainworthyingly met.  

Step 1 : 
Each participant submits wording
or amendment
to describe 
The Problem-Situation 
that firstly needs to be written up
on a whiteboard or visible butcher’s-paper, 
and needs agreement by each participant 
before moving on. 
Keep going around
until what your scribe has written up
on the whiteboard 
is unanimously approved 
by each participant
in a penultimate
“clarification” and “unanimity” round.
– – – – –

Step 2: 
Each participant suggests a solution 
that they imagine might meet every-one’s need 

in the above-written situation.  
Once again no interrupting, no paraphrasing, 
no ‘improving’ the speaker’s own wording. 
[Insert a “clarification & unanimity” round, to be sure].
– – – – –

Step 3:
Go round and round,
evaluating each ‘imagined’ solution; 
e.g. by a show of 
left-hand = 1 point,
right-hand = 2 points, 
both hands = 3 points, 
no hands = 0 points or ‘Anstention’.
[Again maybe do a “clarification/unanimity” round]. 
– – – – –

Step 4:
Select one of those shortlisted solutions; 
OR
cooperatively “cobble-together”
an eclectic-solution 
made up of
the best feature(s)
from any of the solutions
submitted in Step 2. 
[Possible further “Unanimity” round].
– – – – –

Step 5: 
Go round and round again, 
this time constructing firstly a Plan A, 

such as will best honour and ‘win-win-win’ meet
each participant’s
most-important or vital real-need.

That settled, go round and round again, 
constructing a Contingency- Plan B “back-up plan”, 

for
“What to do,
for whatever could go wrong in Plan A –
‘from the inside’, 
or might sabotage it ‘from the outside’.  

Further back-up (contingency) plans
should be decided upon. 

And 
don’t omit “unanimity” rounds, 
to be sure every-one is
“soberly-happy-so-far” 

============================================

Step 6: 
Would now be 
the actual nitty-gritty action ‘on the ground’, 
‘at the coal-face’ and ‘in amongst the grass-roots’
trialling and “live-actioning” the practical implementation
of Plan A,
and of its contingency back-up planning 
where necessary;
[Dr Edward de Bono’s 
Six Action Shoes
 may prove useful
for the Doing of this Implementation.].

————————————————————————–
Remember:

‘Win-Win-Win-(Win-Win-Win-Win)’
is a good mindframe, 
and from it can be included at the very least  

the most-important real-needs 
of
other parties
who are unable to be present 
in the ‘No-Lose’ planning meeting itself. 


Those actually present and participating
will little doubt settle satisfactorily 
their own needs and how best to satisfy them, 
but those present
need
and have a non-negotiale-duty
to also include adequate advocacy 
for all absentees’ needs and hows, 
some of which at least
might be quite different from
or even ‘conflicting-with’
those of the ‘Members-Present’.

====================================================
FINALLY
The best-known “organisational” way
of achieving
best-possible
clear- intercommunication
and
honest-argumentation & moral-reasoning
is
The Threes-Tables Progressive Plenums
one.
======================================================
0130 Sn 07022021.
In-Progress Public-Sharing.
jsdm – editor-publisher :-
johnsdmiles@gmail.com