.1.
“On-The-Spot-‘Selfing'”.
.3.
“Winning” Every “Argument”
– – – – –
[details in the next posts].
—————————-
.2.
‘No-Lose’ – ‘Method III’.
—————————-
FIVE STEP METHOD III
FOR FRIENDLY
‘WIN-WIN-WIN’
COOPERATIVE PROBLEM-SOLVING
AND NEEDS & HOWS RECOGNITION.
{Method I the ‘bosses’ usually win;
Method II the ‘underlings’ usually win:
Method III Every-one’s Need is equally-included}.
– – – – – – –
(With acknowledgement to Dr Thomas Gordon in
‘People’ Effectiveness Training
& further exponents
e.g. Robert Bolton in People Skills).
– – – – – – –
INTRODUCTION:
Please read through
every part
of the following lines
before attempting to judge,
or even think about,
this methodology.
===================================
The Guidance Lines
are of primary
and
‘deal-breaking’
necessity.
– – – – –
Guidance (Rule) #1:
No-one can come with any competitive
or comparative advantage.
Each comes ’empty-handed’, with a ‘blank slate’.
Each participates equally,
patiently,
non-competitively,
non-‘leadingly’,
non-invasively,
non-pushily,
non-manipulatively.
– – – – –
To allow
“improvement by suggestion-or-‘mere-mention'”,
participants might agree to add
a penultimate round,
so that any previous input
may be clarified
& unanimously-approved;
before
confirming every input by the
“in indelible black-ink”
final round.
– – – – –
Guidance #2:
Move in one direction around the round-table;
at each step many patient rounds
will usually give much better results
than merely one or two hurried rounds.
Each person gets equal
non-transferrable time per round.
– – – – –
Guidance #3:
Silence is absolutely ‘Goalden’,
because
each individual needs to be
descending
‘undistracted’
deeper and deeper inside theirself,
until they have finally arrived at,
and formulated into words,
their own
latest-recognised
real and most-important need.
– – – – –
Guidance #4:
Keep going around at each step,
until each participant has clearly stated
in their own words what their ultimate need is.
NB
Everyone needs to include,
at every step,
advocacy-allowances for
Persons-Not-Present
Who-May-Be-Affected
By The Meeting’s
Decisions
Planning
and
Implementation.
– – – – –
Guidance #5:
Remember:
NO interrupting, interpreting, altering;
NO competing.
Let each finish verbatimly at first.
You might have agreed to add
a penultimate rounds for
“clarification & unanimity”;
allowing and even controlledly-encouraging
a possible suggestion for improvement
to any individual’s input or part thereof;
before confirming all Inputs
to be
in the end
“Further Action-Planning & Implementing Cognisantly”
“signed by each participant in black ink”.
– – – – –
Guidance #6:
Similarly
“co-draw-up”
the Details of
Action-Plan-A
and of its
Contingency-Plan-B.
—————————————————————————————————-
This Method III requires
co-voluntary personal
and
unequivocal
commitments:
otherwise,
any-would-be participant
must
“go queue up
to fight it out”
in the
Regular & High Courts-of-Law”.
_______________________
To continue
go on to page 2 for the
Five Steps
and
some support sources.
===================================================
page 2 of 2
Method III :
every-one
gets their real need recognized
and
cooperatively planned to be
co-sustainworthyingly met.
Step 1 :
Each participant submits wording
or amendment
to describe
The Problem-Situation
that firstly needs to be written up
on a whiteboard or visible butcher’s-paper,
and needs agreement by each participant
before moving on.
Keep going around
until what your scribe has written up
on the whiteboard
is unanimously approved
by each participant
in a penultimate
“clarification” and “unanimity” round.
– – – – –
Step 2:
Each participant suggests a solution
that they imagine might meet every-one’s need
in the above-written situation.
Once again no interrupting, no paraphrasing,
no ‘improving’ the speaker’s own wording.
[Insert a “clarification & unanimity” round, to be sure].
– – – – –
Step 3:
Go round and round,
evaluating each ‘imagined’ solution;
e.g. by a show of
left-hand = 1 point,
right-hand = 2 points,
both hands = 3 points,
no hands = 0 points or ‘Anstention’.
[Again maybe do a “clarification/unanimity” round].
– – – – –
Step 4:
Select one of those shortlisted solutions;
OR
cooperatively “cobble-together”
an eclectic-solution
made up of
the best feature(s)
from any of the solutions
submitted in Step 2.
[Possible further “Unanimity” round].
– – – – –
Step 5:
Go round and round again,
this time constructing firstly a Plan A,
such as will best honour and ‘win-win-win’ meet
each participant’s
most-important or vital real-need.
That settled, go round and round again,
constructing a Contingency- Plan B “back-up plan”,
for
“What to do,
for whatever could go wrong in Plan A –
‘from the inside’,
or might sabotage it ‘from the outside’.
Further back-up (contingency) plans
should be decided upon.
And
don’t omit “unanimity” rounds,
to be sure every-one is
“soberly-happy-so-far”
============================================
Step 6:
Would now be
the actual nitty-gritty action ‘on the ground’,
‘at the coal-face’ and ‘in amongst the grass-roots’
trialling and “live-actioning” the practical implementation
of Plan A,
and of its contingency back-up planning
where necessary;
[Dr Edward de Bono’s
Six Action Shoes
may prove useful
for the Doing of this Implementation.].
————————————————————————–
Remember:
‘Win-Win-Win-(Win-Win-Win-Win)’
is a good mindframe,
and from it can be included at the very least
the most-important real-needs
of other parties
who are unable to be present
in the ‘No-Lose’ planning meeting itself.
Those actually present and participating
will little doubt settle satisfactorily
their own needs and how best to satisfy them,
but those present
need
and have a non-negotiale-duty
to also include adequate advocacy
for all absentees’ needs and hows,
some of which at least
might be quite different from
or even ‘conflicting-with’
those of the ‘Members-Present’.
====================================================
FINALLY
The best-known “organisational” way
of achieving
best-possible
clear- intercommunication
and
honest-argumentation & moral-reasoning
is
The Threes-Tables Progressive Plenums
one.
======================================================
0130 Sn 07022021.
In-Progress Public-Sharing.
jsdm – editor-publisher :-
johnsdmiles@gmail.com
